Shadows And Dust
by ShadowWolf85
Summary: Edward is a centuries-old Vampire trying not to let his inner monster win and kill the beautiful and mysterious Bella. Will the demon in him allow him to destroy her, or will his humanity overrule the monster and let him love again?
1. Interview With The Vampire

This is my first attempt at a twilight fanfiction, so please review and criticize!

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyers owns Twilight, I own a Bowl af Strawberry Frosted Mini Wheats and a pack of Marlboro Reds.

****

Fucking High School. Quite literally had to be the worst experiance of the past two hundred some-odd years, and I've had to go through it for the better part of two centuries. By this time I was quite certain that I knew enough about the four basic courses to write my own textbook, and it would contain three time the information contained in the current "required reading material".

At least I had one thing to brighten up my day. I had class with Emmet and Alice this year. I would, at the very least, have someone I could share the idiocracy of this whole situation with, while feigning interest in the same courseload we've all come to know by heart. Both my other "siblings" had been able to move on to bigger and better things. Rosalie was an extremely successful engine designer, for Porsche, no less. Jasper was working as a Senior Editor for the local newspaper. It irked me to no end that because he looked slightly older than I was, he could pull that off and no one would ask questions.

It wasn't so easy for me.

I'd always looked the youngest out of the five of us, so while sometimes even Em and Alice were able to pass off as old enough to work, I was stuck in school.

I could hear the thoughts swarming as soon as we stepped foot out of my car. Always the same lines. Like a joke with no punchline.

_And here come the Cullens...Gah why do they even show up? Such freaks!_

_Damn, there's that little Cullen chick. I'd fuck the shit out of her!_

_I wonder what he thinks of me?_

_I hope my classes aren't too hard..._

I actually laughed at the second thought to pass my mind. Alice would love that shit.

Always the same bullshit. Always the same idiot people. Their faces might change, but the attitudes survived generations.

Never could I find one person that actually had a mind that was interesting enough to want to listen to.

Not that it would matter.

Even if I did, their bodies would whither and die before mine had aged a single day. Their skin sagging, filling with creases and crow's feet around their eyes, while my skin stayed white as porcelain and the sparkle of my eyes never fading.

I stopped searching after I watched the hundreth person I cared for grow old and die in front of me. I resigned myself after that to be alone for the remainder of eternity. Emmet had Rose, Jasper had Alice, Carlisle had Esme, and I had my piano and my Volvo. Somehow I think I came away with the short end of the stick.

I continued to wallow in my self pity all the way to my first class. Biology. Jesus I hated this class. I swear the teachers all read their lesson plan from a handbook. Every senior year was the exact same curriculum as the last, right down to the fucking lab work. I could already guess. We would be blood typing today, same as four years ago, and four years before that. Hell, the microscopes didn't even look like they'd been updated since the last time I'd done this lab.

I took my normal seat near the window, carefully avoiding the sunniest seats in the room, and waited for the lecture to start. Thoughts still assaulted me from everyone in the room, ranging from who someone wanted to hook up with, to worrying about college, to complete daydreaming. And then I caught a thought that caught me off guard.

_I wonder if this new chick is hot?_

There was a new girl on campus? I didn't understand how this could have been the first I've heard of this. In a town as small as Forks, Washington, I knew everything before it happened. It was my job. It peaked my curiosity momentarily, before I reverted back to bored and comtemplative.

Her scent assaulted me like a brick wall.

It was as if I had been punched in the face. Literally knocked the breath right out of me. My entire world was filled with the scent of cocoa and strawberries, and it was suffocating me.

I clasped a hand over my mouth and nose to try and stop the smell from invading my body any more, and I looked up from my slouch to see what creature this scent emanated from.

Her face was hidden from me, her long brown hair shielding her from view.

In some part of my mind it registered that Mr. Banner had instructed her to take a seat, and the only empty seat was the one place I didn't want her, and wanted nothing more all at the same time.

Right next to me.

I needed to remove myself from that room, that school. I needed to find some poor soul in a far away place and drain the life from his veins. Or I would end up killing every single person in this room simply to make that smell go away.

Picking my pack up, I excused myself, claiming stomach trouble, and practically ran from the lab to my car. Dumping it into the backseat, I put on the loudest, heaviest metal I could find, and sped out of the school parking lot at about a hundred and ten miles an hour, headed straight for Port Angeles. I smiled remembering my stock of contact lenses. The joys of the venom, I had to change the things every two hours or so or the red/black would start to peek through. I needed to feed. Badly.

Edward Cullen did not massacre classrooms because of one human's scent. I couldn't let it happen.

In less than twenty minutes I was in a hole in the wall bar in the seedier part of Port Angeles, letting my Jack and Coke go untouched and surveying the thoughts of my potential victims. Three grueling hours went by, before I finally spotted someone. No family, extremely intoxicated, and walking home alone. Easy prey and no strings. Perfect.

***

I had gone a full week without incident, and had even managed a few meager words to the brunette sitting next to me in biology. I've had to hunt every night in order to keep my head around her, but it was a small price to pay for not wiping the class off the face of the earth. Although I was starting to think that taking stock out in that contact company might not be a bad idea after all.

I felt I deserved a little reprieve. A little something to take my mind off of her.

Bella Swan.

The daughter of the Chief of Police, apparently just moved back to this shit-hole town after years of absence. I slowly pieced her story together from what I heard from the other students, but it was nothing out of the ordinary. Quiet, excelled in her studies, dreams of being the next Danielle Steel, or something to that effect. She was totally, completely normal. So why did I find myself obsessing over her?

I could not get her off my mind.

I hoped that a little adolescent fun would help do the trick. Supposedly there was to be a party tonight, so lots of drugs, alcohol, and sex. None of which I wanted any part of. There weren't enough drugs or alcohol in the state to get me to the point of fucked-up that I wanted to be. But I went anyways. Just to do something a little different.

When I arrived the party was in full swing. Drunken thoughts entered my mind. Beer, weed, sex, weed, sex, beer, sex, sex, sex, home?

I heard the last thought and zeroed in on a tall blonde girl. Jessica, or Jennifer. Something along those lines anyways. She was wondering why someone would want to go home. That was when I spotted who she was talking to.

Her.

Bella.

The only person in this godforsaken town who's inner voice I could not hear. She was a complete mystery to me. What was so special about this one human, with her chocolate eyes and hair to match?

God damn it. Why could I not seem to shake this girl? I determined myself to find out. Tonight. I had to know what it was about this woman that captured my attention so that the rest of this miserable existence faded away, and we were the only two people left in the world.

I followed her outside.

She was walking slowly, head down, toward the backyard. Why the backyard, if she wanted to leave? Wouldn't she have parked around front with the rest of the thirty seven billion vehicles?

She moped over to the gazebo in the backyard and sat down on a bench quietly. I could hear her breathing from my perch on the roof, but other than that there were no sounds in the dark lit area. I decided to just man up and say something. Edward Cullen was not one for beating around the bush.

Her head whipped up so fast I thought she'd hurt herself when I spoke. Hanging upside down from the roof with just my haed showing.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

The most delicious shade of red colored her cheeks as she looked at the ground, but remained silent.

"Bella? Are you all right?"

She looked up at me again, this time with a curious expression on her face. I flipped myself onto the level surface of the floor and sat opposit of her, giving her (and my nose) plenty of room.

"How did you know my name? I was sure you didn't even know I existed..."

A small chuckle escaped my lips before I could stop it.

"I'm sorry. It's just that you're the talk of the school. Your name is on everyone's lips. I don't think there's anyone in the school that doesn't know who you are."

"Oh...I guess so..."

She looked down dejectedly and began shuffling her feet again. I cleared my throat, apparently getting nowhere fast with my attempts at small talk.

"So, did I hear you say something about wanting to leave? If I may ask, why are you still moping around all alone in the dark?

"Jessica drove, and she's not ready to leave yet. I'm stuck here until she's ready."

This was bad. Very, very bad. I did the only thing I could think of, and regretted it the moment the words had left my lips.

"Well, I'm bored here myself, and was planning on heading out as well. I can give you a lift home if you like...?"

Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuckity, fuck. Not good Cullen. Alone in a car with someone who's scent makes you want to either fuck her senseless or drain the blood from her body. Smart move.

She raised her eyes to meet mine for the first time, and I was undone. Her eyes were perfect pools of melted chocolate. Deep with thought and emotion, yet sparkling with...happiness?

"Actually, that would be great. Thank you so much."

Her eyes continued to follow mine as I stood, and I extended my hand to help her up. I was smart enough to feed before I came here tonight. A hungry Vampire, alone in a house full of drunk and stupid teenagers was a bad combination all the way around.

She seemed a little hesitant, but after a moment put her small hand into mine, and I jerked involuntarily. Not only had the mere touch of her hand sent a feeling not unlike an electric shock all the way up my arm, but her hand fir perfectly in mine.

Like it was made to be there.

Definetely very, very bad.

I knew it was not just a hallucination or something unreal, because the second I felt it, her hand spasmed as well. Or she simply could have felt that my hand was as cold as Death's itself. I thought the reaction was from the electricity, not the temperature, but there was no way to be sure. I knew she had felt it too. And that scared me more than my own reaction. This was getting deep, fast.

She looked back up at me after staring at our joined hands for a solid minute and said in a soft voice that was lower and huskier than her normal tone, something that made other body parts then my hair stand on end.

"So, should we head over to my place then?"

Oh, dear lord, she was going to get herself into deep shit with that sexy little mouth of hers.

_Wait, did I just think of her mouth as sexy?! Get ahold of yourself, Cullen!_

I didn't say a damn word, as I walked her out to my car. Opened the door for her and everything. Something was not right. I'm supposed to be indifferent, aloof. I shouldn't give a shit about anyone or anything mortal. But this Bella...she was doing something to me. My heart was beating for the first time in over a hundred years. Nothing good could possibly come of this. This would only end in heartbreak for one or both of us, can't get involved. But I wanted to. God, did I want to.

I made a decision right then and there;

Bella Swan was going to be trouble.

***

The car ride to her house was excruciating. I literally had to hold my breath throught the entire trip to keep her scent from assaulting my senses. Luckily for me, breathing was an option, not a neccessity. Not a word passed my lips, and we sat in an uncomfortable silence for almost fifteen minutes, until she began messing with my radio to put on some bass-y rap garbage. Bad move Swan.

"Uh uh, I don't think so. That rap shit does not work with me. If you're going to fuck around with my radio, you'll have to do better than that."

The corners of her lips turned upwards slightly and she went through station after station, until I stopped her. Without a word I stared at her and waggled my finger back and forth to leave it. The opening bars of Bodies by Drowning Pool had started, and while not the smartest pick for my current situation, it was still one of my all time favorite songs.

I sighed contentedly, and immediately her scent hit me again like a force of nature. Fuck. Me. Running. Sideways. I had to stop doing that shit. I was going to get me in trouble and her either dead or panting below me. Though the latter was sounding better and better.

_Stop that shit, Cullen! You DO NOT need to be thinking like that about this girl! _

I let my eyes roam over her for the thousandth time, in order to appreciate the full beauty of her. Modest clothing covered abundant curves. Full, pouty, kiss-me lips, and those eyes. God, her eyes were the color of melted chocolate and deeper than all 5 Great Lakes put together. My gaze fell, taking in the swell of her breasts and the flatness of her stomach, and I ached, literally ached, to feel the smooth skin there.

_Snap the fuck out of it! This girl is trouble with a capital...Fuck._

She had just shaken her hair out of her tight ponytail, and I had to swerve to avoid oncoming traffic. That one gesture was the sexiest thing I had even seen a female do. Fuck me, was I in trouble.

My near-accident caused her to look up from her lap and stare at me, while I had my eyes planted firmly on the road ahead of me. The problem was, I felt her eyes on me. Openly staring me, and looking me up and down. She was checking me out, and that one, simple fact had me wanting to jump and cheer. When I snuck a quick peek over at her, I was blown away.

She was staring, openly, at the bulge in my jeans.

_And put a fork in me, I am fucking done._

I continued to stare at her, and noticed her shoulders had tensed. She raised her eyes sheepishly to meet mine, as her mouth hung open.

"See something you like?"

The words were out of my mouth before I could even process what I was saying. That glorious blush raged across her face again, and I could barely contain my happiness. This gorgeous little thing next to me was checking out the goods! My mind raged at me.

_Cool it, Cullen! You've had hundreds, thousands of chicks look at you that exact same way before! This is nothing special, and in less than a hundred years, she'll be gone and you'll be alone again._

Well if that wasn't enough to put me back into a dark and depressed mood, the next words out of Bella's mouth were.

"That's it up there, the third house on the left."

And just as quickely as it had began, my happy night was drawing to an end. I sighed, letting my exasperation show. She looked quizically at me and a small smile passed her lips.

"I know. I don't want it to end quite yet, either."

My surprise must have showed on my face, because she made as if to say more, but we were pulling into her driveway, and she was one step from being out of my car and away from me again. I don't know why, but part of me was almost crying at the thought. So I said the first thing that came to my mind, and knew I was fucked the second I said it.

"The night doesn't have to end you know..."

Realization dawned on her face as she processed my words, and her blush returned full force. Holy aching balls Batman. I basically just offered myself up on a silver platter for this little vixen. And then it hit me.

I wanted her. I wanted her like she was water and I had just skipped across the entire Mojave desert with a Burka on. I needed her. I craved her. And I could only hope that she felt the same attraction, the same primal instinct. I wanted to throw her over my shoulder and drag her back into my cave and lay waste to her, like the neanderthal she made me become. And I liked it. I fucking loved it. And then I heard the sexiest words that had ever been spoken come out of those soft, pink lips.

"Would you care to come inside for a drink? My father is still on duty for a few more hours, so we won't be disturbed."

_Oh. Fuck. Me. Running._

***

Reviews are better than car rides with Edward at half mast! Okay, maybe not, but you should still review anyways. lol


	2. Inside the Fire

Thank you for all those that read and reviewed, they are the only reason I keep writing. The more reviews there are for me to read, the faster the chapters get uploaded. =)

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight and all characters depicted herein. I own a pack of Camels and a schizophrenic cat.

***

_Oh. Fuck. Me. Running._

I was fucked. I was completely screwed; there was nothing I could do. I may as well hand her the stake to kill me. In the metaphorical sense, of course. When she said those words to me I literally felt as if the clouds had opened up and a chorus of cherub faced angels had started singing "Hallelujah."

Until that cockblocking little voice in the back of my mind piped up and reared his ugly little head.

_You CAN'T do this Edward. What if you can't control yourself? What if her blood sings to you too sweet for you to suppress? Will you be able to let it just be sex?_

I groaned audibly, and she shifted uncomfortably in the passenger seat of my car. She was staring at me with a pained look on her face as I pinched the bridge of my nose shut with two fingers. That shit-eating little voice was right. I couldn't risk this girl's life, not just for sex. And I knew that I didn't deserve anything more than that.

My voice was pained, and the next sentence I spoke felt like I was ripping my own heart in two. Why did I feel this connection, this spark with someone I didn't even know?

"I'm sorry, Bella. I wasn't thinking. You should go inside. I don't deserve someone like you."

I expected her face to fall, or to be angry at the rejection, or any other emotion. But the next thing to leave those gorgeous lips had me rock hard and fantasizing all sorts of things I could do to this girl.

"Don't worry about what you deserve. I'm not asking you to have wild, crazy, primal grunting and moaning sex with me. I'm just asking you to join me for a drink. In my house. Alone."

Now how could I say no to that?

An hour later and we were sitting in her kitchen as she chugged down her eleventh Budweiser straight. To say I was amazed would have been an understatement. She was the only person I had ever met who could make me wish to be a beer bottle. To feel those lips pursed around the tip, fell the suction as she took a deep pull… I spent the entire time in varying states of sexual frustration. Thankfully, she was too engorged with her story and too intoxicated from the alcohol to notice my lack of conversation.

She had stopped asking me if I wanted anything after I declined the fourth time. I was content to just sit there and listen, and watch her eyes sparkle in the moonlight. She spoke of her father, Charlie, the Chief of Police here in Forks. Her mother, Renee, back in Arizona, and her mother's new husband, Phil. I heard every word. The only problem was I caught myself staring at her throat more times than I could count. It was time to get going.

Just as I thought that I could hear someone walking up drive quietly. She had apparently not heard it yet, and when I stood up she followed suit. I held a finger to my lips as I motioned with my head to the front door. She understood immediately, and tiptoed over to the back door. She leaned into me, with her tiny hands covering my forearms.

"Will I see you at school on Monday?"

Such a silly question. We had Biology together on Monday, and I would move mountains and trudged through Hell and High Water to be there with her.

"Of course you will. You can see me anytime you want to. I live less than fifteen minutes away from here, and I'm only a phone call away."

The smile she held, quite literally, lit up the room we were standing in. I didn't know what it was about this girl, but I vowed then and there that I would tame the monster. I would do anything I could to get closer to this brown-haired angel, and may God have mercy on whoever thought to stand in my way.

I began making my way out of the back of the house, just as I heard someone trying the knob on the front door. Something registered in my mind then, but it was lost. I couldn't concentrate on anything but the small girl in my arms, and the fact that she had just raised her lips to meet mine.

My world was tilted on its axis. Everything around me stopped, and time seemed to stand still. She was kissing me, Bella was kissing me. It was the most amazing thing I had ever felt, and I knew it had to end.

"Bella, I have to go. If your father catches us in here like this he'll never let you see me again. I _will_ see you soon. You can count on that."

I raced through the back door, remembering to tone down my speed so as to not seem out of the ordinary, and I had made it to the darkened side of the house before my mind registered what had happened just minutes ago.

Charlie wouldn't turn the knob on the front door. He would use a key.

And something else clicked as I was sprinting back to the back door…

My car was parked in front of her house.

Now I knew something was wrong. If the Chief of Police had seen a strange car parked in his driveway at close to one in the morning, he would have burst into that house with hellfire on his mind. I had to get back in there. I had to protect her. I had to save my Bella.

In seconds, I had rounded the entire house and stood in front of the sliding glass door in the back. Finding it locked, I reached out with my senses to try and pick up something…anything that would let me know what was happening. Finally, after a full sixty seconds of getting nothing, I listened to the voices in my head. I hadn't heard anything all night, because Bella's mind was closed to me, and subconsciously I had shut that part of my brain off, and just enjoyed the company. I took me less than two seconds to find what I was looking for. A male "voice", coming from inside her house. But something wasn't right. The mind thought like nothing I had ever heard before. Thoughts of rending flesh with teeth, of dominating the frightened girl in the house. This thing lusted for flesh like I lusted for blood, and today, he wanted Bella.

The sane part of me told me to walk away, that it wasn't my problem. If she died, she died, and that's the way it was meant to be. But something had my feet moving to the trellis adorning her house, and climbing with inhuman speed to the top window. Thankfully, that was unlocked. I slipped inside and followed the thoughts downstairs, back to the kitchen where I had been less than five minutes before. I saw Bella, back against the stove, and her would-be assailant standing directly in front of me, between her and me.

His back was to me, and he apparently hadn't noticed I was there yet. I took advantage of the element of surprise and asked my question to Bella, in a very low tone, almost a growl.

"Bella? Is everything okay? Is this a friend of yours?"

I had apparently startled the other man as he turned to me for the first time. His skin was the color of mahogany, finely chiseled features and hair that was black as night. He stiffened at the sight of me, and his nostrils flared. I realized what it was about him that was off. He smelled of wilderness.

The scent coming off this man was of pine needles and grass, woodlands and trees. I knew his scent, I knew it like I knew the moon would rise in the night sky.

_Werewolf._

She shook her head at me as tears started falling down her face. He was no friend, and with the glimpse inside his mind, I knew that there was nothing friendly about this visit. Bella was motionless, mouth agape in shock, and I knew that this could not happen here.

Her phone rang, and all three of us jumped. I heard the click of the answering machine, and suddenly the house was filled with her father's voice.

"Bells, I'm just calling to tell you I'm on my way down to Mason County, they had an animal attack that matches one of the victims from up here, so I won't be in before tomorrow night. Be good."

I sighed. Well, at least that was one hurdle that we wouldn't have to face. I turned my attention back to the dog in front of me.

"You have two choices right now, _mutt_; Walk away and don't ever look in the direction of this house or this girl again, or we go outside and find out just how much you want her."

My voice had dropped to a low growl by the time I had finished speaking, and I could tell that the mutt would be taking option number two. I walked to the back door, opening it and stepping outside. I never once took my eyes of the man in front of me, and he followed me without a word. We stood, circling each other in Bella's backyard, making it look as if we were fighting for dominance. Which, in a sense, I guess we were.

Bella had followed us, still completely silent. Her eyes were on my opponent as he stripped the shirt off his body. This seemed to snap her out of whatever trance she was in, and she shouted, just as he leapt and shifted, in mid-air.

"Jake, don't!!"

I was floored. She knew this mutt? Did she know what he was, what he wanted to do to her? I couldn't let that cloud my senses right now. I had to focus, had to stop whatever intentions this thing had with Bella.

Because if I failed, she would die.

I vaguely heard her scream over the sounds of "Jake's" growling and pacing.

"Edward, you can't fight him! Don't you see what he is?! He'll kill you!"

I heard all of this in slow motion as Jake lunged for me, swiping at my chest with his claws. I heard the screech of his claws as they shredded my shirt, and the sound obviously hurt his ears. He turned to look at me with the amber eyes of his wolf, and thought one word.

_Vampire!_

And he turned, and bolted through the woods. I was baffled. I hadn't even done any damage yet, and he was already running away? I turned back towards the woman standing on the balcony, and her face was contorted. I could see the ribbons of torn material where the beast's claws had raked me, but there was not a scratch on my porcelain skin.

And she had seen it. She had seen my speed when I moved, seen my strength when I vaulted the trellis, and she had seen the way razor sharp claws raked across my body hadn't even left a mark. She knew. She had to know.

She looked frightened of her words, and took a deep breath.

"You're impossibly fast, and strong. Your skin is pale white and ice-cold. Your eyes change color, and sometimes you speak like you're from a different time. You never eat or drink anything, you never go out in the sunlight… How old are you?"

She was shaking by this point, and I couldn't blame her. I was about to confirm her deepest fear.

"I'm seventeen." I replied, in a breathy voice.

"How long have you been seventeen?"

I stared intently at her as I said this, letting the words sink in.

"A while."

Her breath was coming in pants now, and she looked almost on the verge of tears.

"I know what you are."

"Say it… out loud. Say it." My breath was little more than a whisper now, but I had to make sure she understood.

Her hands were shaking when she said the one word I was looking for;

"Vampire."

The monster in me smiled when he heard his name called out. I squashed that part of me down, and continued.

"Are you afraid?"

She had responded no, and I proceeded to ask her the one question that could change her mind.

"Then ask me the most basic question. What do we eat?"

***

Reviews are better than Edward's beer bottle fantasy!


	3. The Lion and the Lamb

**Okay, so in the last chapter, I took the revelation scene directly from the movie. I figured, since it's already been said perfectly, why screw it up? Don't worry, that will be the last of that. Everything from here on out, you'll have to imagine yourself without the use of visual aids. Lol.**

**Thanks to all those that have reviewed and will continue to do so, it is the only reason I continue to write.**

**~*Warning*~**

**This chapter contains a mini-lemon, nothing significant yet.**

**~* Disclaimer*~**

**SM owns Twilight and all characters depicted herein, except for one. I own a sleeping cat on my stomach and freshly baked peanut butter cookies. Wally World rules!!!**

**For Melz. The inspiration for this fanfic.**

*******

**The Day After**

I arrived home from my run still in a state of pure euphoria. Not only had she figured out my dark secret, not only had she accepted me in spite of it, but she wanted to know more about it. Not to mention the fact that she seemed to be accustomed to metaphysical weirdness due to her longstanding "friendship" with that mutt, Jacob. Remembering what had transpired last night after he had run away with his tail between his legs, I let the scene unfold again in my memory.

***

_Bella flipped the switch to the kitchen light as we made our way back inside and gestured to the small table for me to sit down. The smell of coffee slowly began to weave its way through the house, and I chuckled slightly._

"_What's so funny?" she asked, a tinge of annoyance playing at her words._

"_I don't drink…coffee."_

_That blush raged across her features again, and again I fought the urge to take her in my arms and drain the life from her veins. This was not healthy. For me or for her._

"_I'm sorry, I guess I just don't know what's fact or fiction when it comes to…people like you."_

"_Vampires." I stated. "You can say the word, it's not like it'll offend me. And how about this; you ask me true or false about anything you want, and I'll let you separate out the 'fact from fiction' as you put it."_

_She seemed to think about that for a minute, and nodded slightly, almost more to herself than to me._

"_Okay, I guess that's fair. Garlic?"_

"_Fiction."_

"_Crosses?"_

"_Fiction."_

"_Running water?"_

_I laughed hard at that one. _

"_You really think we'd live in a place like Forks if water bothered us?"_

_I saw a triumphant smile light up her face, and the question must have showed on my face._

"_I was debating on whether to ask whether or not there were more people…like you." She had looked down when she said it, almost as if she were embarrassed._

_Fuck. Well, I was breaking all the rules anyways, might as well tell her about my family._

"_All of my 'family' are Vampires. Carlisle was the first, my father for all intents and purposes. He turned my 'mother', Esme, when she was presumed dead after an attempted suicide. They fell in love, and have had the perfect marriage ever since. _

_Carlisle found me dying of Spanish Influenza, and turned me in order to keep me from death, and I became their son._

_Then there was Alice. We don't know who turned her, but we do know it was to keep a tracker from killing her. Her parents had institutionalized her because she is able to, subjectively, see the future. _

_Then Rosalie was turned after being gang raped and beaten by her ex-fiancé and his friends. She ended up killing every one of them after Carlisle found her broken and bleeding in the street, dying from the ordeal._

_Emmett was the last Carlisle turned. Rosalie found him after he was mauled nearly to death by a bear, and carried him over a hundred miles to Carlisle. She almost killed him when she smelled his blood, but now they're inseparable."_

_I was smiling slightly by this time, remembering each of their stories and how they had impacted my life, and I frowned as the last story began to pour from my mouth._

"_Jasper was…different. The oldest of the 'children', he is a veteran. Of the Civil War." The shocked expression Bella had on her face was priceless. "Remember, we don't age, ever. So he looks the same as he did back then, with a few changes to hair and clothes. He was turned by a Vampire named Maria, who made him do things that Satan himself would frown on. He came to us willingly, and I'm pretty sure he and Alice are destined to be together. Like Esme and Carlisle, and Rosalie and Emmett. I'm the only one that hasn't found their soul mate. Though I don't think that spending more time with you would be too bad of an idea."_

_I finished my tale of our family, and she had her chin held in her tented fingers. She seemed to be thinking of the next question to ask me. It didn't matter at this point. She knew the worst, or as close to the worst that I was willing to tell her now. _

"_Okay, so you mentioned that Alice has visions, and you can read minds. Does every Vampire have a special ability?"_

_Smart girl._

"_Well, sort of. Most of our abilities are subconscious, and nothing special to note. Emmett has strength that surpasses all of ours, and Rosalie's beauty is literally mesmerizing. I can read minds, Alice has visions of the future, but those visions change as people change their minds and make varying decisions. Esme has the capacity to unconditionally love anyone and anything she wants to, and Carlisle has the gift of unparalleled compassion. He is able to withstand the call of human blood, and is able to stop drinking before death, in order to change a human."_

_A heavy sigh left me then, remembering Jasper's gift, and the ways he had used them in his youth._

"_Again, Jasper is different. His gift is the most powerful, and fearsome of all. When Jasper was turned, he gained the ability to feel and manipulate people's emotions. He can literally make someone feel whatever he wants them to. It is an extremely useful talent for deterring unwanted attention to us._

_So now that I've told you all about my family, I need to know something from you." A flash of the Hannibal Lector movie ran through my mind, a slight smile crossed my face. "A quid pro quo, if you will."_

_She laughed at me, full of musical tones and breathy notes. It was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard._

"_Wow, seen too much Silence of the Lambs, much?" She calmed herself down enough to breathe. "Okay, shoot."_

"_It's actually two questions, but they break down to be the same explanation. How do you know that mutt, and just what the hell was he doing here?"_

_I watched as she shivered noticeably, before she spoke. _

"_His name is Jacob Black. He was my boyfriend."_

_Her words stung me more than any blow could have. Why did I care? What was it about this girl that made me want to kill her, and everyone that had ever touched her, one second and hold her to me for the rest of time the next? I couldn't believe that she had allowed some dog to touch her, to care for her. It literally made my heart hurt._

_She sighed before continuing._

"_Jacob grew up on the Rez, and he and my father are long time friends. I pretty much grew up with him, before my parents split up. Maybe it was the time we knew each other, or the amount of time we spent together, but eventually we found ourselves romantically involved. I thought I loved him._

_The first time I saw him shift, I ran home and didn't speak to him for over a week. I couldn't believe that he had kept something like that a secret from me. It threw my world upside down. But eventually, I got used to it._

_And then I saw him eat someone. I realized that I couldn't love a monster, and that if something like that threw me that badly, it couldn't have been true love. I broke it off with him, and hadn't seen him since. Until tonight. That was three months before I left for Arizona."_

_I breathed a sigh of relief. She wasn't dating him now, didn't harbor any lingering feelings for him, and that left her open to my advances. I was literally trying to hold in the feelings in my body. I wanted to yell, scream, and jump on the table and cheer. But I kept that indifferent expression on my face. _

_It hurt. She couldn't love a monster. I was more of a monster then that dog could ever be. I had killed countless people over the centuries, and caused so much pain and suffering. If seeing the monster come out once was enough to tear her from Jacob, then how fast would she run screaming from me when mine reared his head? There was only one option. I had to beat down the monster in me. I had to tame the darkness, and protect her from anything that would try to harm her. Even if it was me._

_We talked until the sun started to peek over the horizon, and I knew it was time to go. The sun would be shining soon, and the Chief would be getting home later tonight. She had to sleep, and getting caught out in the sunshine would be a bad idea. Today was supposed to be one of the unusual days in Forks where the sun would actually make it past the cloud bank and reach the ground. _

_I was about to walk out the back door for the second time in less than six hours, and again her hands pulled me back to her. Raising her lips to mine, she let me taste her lips again. This time I was not quite so shocked. I kissed her back, passionately, and pulled her body to mine in a tight embrace. She moaned into my mouth, and I could feel myself picking her up and placing her onto the kitchen table. I could feel my hardness coming into contact with her leg as I leaned on top of her, and felt her push her hips up in response. The smell, oh good God, the smell. I could almost taste the scent of her arousal on the air, and I could imagine myself dipping my tongue into her wet folds, tasting her, hearing her calling out my name as she clenched around me. My mouth was literally watering with the thought, and I had to remind myself of my control. I could not afford to let my resolve weaken this early in the game. If it did, all would be lost._

_My mouth traveled lower, following the line of her jaw to the crook of her neck. I could feel her pulse below my mouth, I could smell the blood running just below the surface. And then she did the one thing that was the hardest to resist._

_She craned her neck to the side, giving me full access to her jugular vein. I almost lost it, almost let my fangs descend and tear her throat out to let that warm liquid slide down my throat. Almost. I placed a chaste kiss on top of her pulse and pulled back slowly._

"_Bella, we have to stop. Don't worry, we will continue that, but I want to take my time with you. I feel very…protective of you._

_I made my way out the door, giving her one last chaste kiss before I called back over my shoulder, and began sprinting through the woods._

"_By the way, my number is in your phone, stored under Edward C!"_

_***_

I heard tapping on my door and knew who it was before I opened it. She was the one person in this house who's mind I chose not to read, simply because she deserved to have her private thoughts, well, private. Melissa. Whom I had fondly taken to calling Melz.

She was gorgeous. Not in the Rosalie sense, but more of the traditional way. Long, deep brown hair, and legs that went on for miles. She was the newest addition to our household, and was fitting in perfectly. She was the only one besides me that didn't have qualms about drinking human blood, and she loved going hunting with me. We had had our moments, openly flirting here and there, but she was always off-limits.

She was taken.

She was involved with the scum of the earth, Mike Newton. Someone who could never understand her like I could, and someone who would never be enough for her. She had finally broken it off with him and, even though it hurt her as well, she was all the stronger for it.

Her brown eyes had a sparkle in them today, and I wondered what had made her happy. Yet still, I waited for her to tell me rather then search her mind and find out myself. She pouted at me and stuck a finger into my chest playfully.

"Why don't you just look to see for yourself? I've told you that as long as you don't repeat my fantasies to anyone else, you can look. But some of those fantasies involve you, so I'd suggest you look carefully…"

Laughing, I pulled her into a tight hug and whispered.

"It's not the permission, Melz, it's just that usually I can tell what you're thinking without reading it. And sometimes _those_ thoughts are very readable."

She blushed, and again I wondered how such a natural thing could be so sexy. Giggling, she pulled back slightly.

"Be careful, mister, or Carlisle will have your head for talking like that. And besides, what would your new human plaything think of you talking to me like that?"

I froze. Every single muscle in my body stopped moving, and I stood there in shock. How did she know about Bella? How could she possibly have known what happened? My shock must have shown on my face, because she giggled again and patted my arm in a gesture of reassurance.

"Don't worry E, no one else knows. I read your happiness and traced the line to the human. Anyone who knows you can tell that you're in a great mood. So tell me, was she great in the sack?"

Even I blushed at that one, and that I had forgotten her ability. Melissa could sense someone's emotion, and follow the emotion like a line back to its source, and find what emotion it caused in other person as well. In this way she could literally find anyone and everyone that a person has ever come into contact with. It was extremely useful for hunting, and for getting under my skin. Until a light bulb flashed in my head, and a ruthless smile came across my features. I stared into her eyes and asked her a simple question.

"Melz, would you like to go hunting with me tonight? I need you to follow someone's mind trail. You'll find it if you go back to Bella, and search for the feeling of fear. There should be a line connecting her to a man named Jacob."

Her eyes darkened and her smile matched my own. She loved the hunt almost as much as I did, and relished in anything that could be a challenge.

"Sure I can. Is this a real hunt or recon work?"

My own eyes went dark, and I knew without looking that they would be black as night.

"No, my dear, this is as real as it gets. We're going wolf hunting."

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**A/N: **

**Okay, so there you have chapter 3! Melz will have a recurring role in this story, and it will be no small part! As always, please review if you have the chance. I'll give every person that reviews a little teaser about just how big of a role Melz will have in the story, and what her relationship is and will be with Edward. I'll have chapter 4 out early if we can get to 20 reviews! Can we do it? Show me!**

**Shadow**

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Reviews are better than Edward pouncing you on a kitchen table! Okay, definitely not, but still. lol


	4. Woe and Behold

**I'm sorry for the long wait, all, but I've been going through some incredibly serious real life stuff recently, and just haven't gotten around to updating. A few things before we get to the chapter;**

**Author recommendations:**

_**Breaking Trinity by VvDeadRosesvV**_

**www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net(slash)s(slash)5379823(slash)1**

_**The RunAways by SimplyDazzling**_

_**www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net(slash)s(slash)5476271(slash)1**_

**I am actually the beta for this fic, so please stop by and show both of my ladies some love. Lord knows they deserve it.**

**Disclaimer: SM owns twilight and all characters depicted herein, except Melz, she's all mine =)**

_**~*WARNING*~**_

_**CITRUS CONTENT!**_

_**If you are not old enough, or don't want to read a lemon scene, GTFO. This is the first lemon of many, so enjoy!**_

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The forest peeled away from us as we followed the trail, blazing through the brush at speeds that would make an Italian sports car shit itself. It was amazing that it had taken me this long to place the dark skin tone and hair color of the mutt. I should have smelled the Rez on him from miles away.

Melz had found Jacob's emotional line and traced it back to La Push, a small Native American reservation a short distance from Forks. We had taken the forest, trusting our own superior speed to the conspicuous alternative of one of my family's flashy vehicles.

It was times like this that I actually enjoyed being undead. The speed, the strength, the feeling of absolute calm and certainty when we discovered the means to an end. This was no test, this wasn't running for fun. As I'd told Melz, this was as real as it got. We were going to kill or be killed, to take revenge on the mongrel that had almost done unspeakable things to my new charge. This was the hunt; the only things that mattered in our minds at that moment were following the scent, and knowing when our time would be to strike.

We slowed as we entered the campgrounds of La Push, farther behind enemy lines then we'd ever come before. I could smell wolf all over this place, and I knew I'd be hard pressed to get the stink from my clothes.

Melz stiffened beside me, and I heard the sharp intake of breath as two people entered the clearing where the campfire was beginning to die down. I watched, with morbid curiosity as the two sat on the furthest log from us, close enough to barely see by the campfire's light, and began to talk in whispers so low even I couldn't pick the words up. The only thing ringing in my ears was the sound of the fire popping and the thoughts coming from the male seated across from me. His mind had the same tone, the same _flavor_, as the mongrel that had stalked my Bella. And it was for good reason.

Jacob Black looked directly at me as he bent to capture the females lips with his own, a triumphant grin on his smug face. It was then that I realized that the female's long brown tresses were the same length, her clothes the same style. The scent that radiated from her was wolf, from being so close to that mongrel. But under the offending stench was something I'd come to rely on, something that no other human on this earth smelled of.

_Cocoa and fresh strawberries. _

The same feeling that I had the first day I caught her scent hit me, a thousand times more potent, and I staggered back with my hand covering my face. This couldn't be what I was thinking. I had to be jumping to conclusions. A million possibilities crossed through my mind, each one more absurd then the last, and were disregarded just as quickly. I chanced a look back at the two sitting on their makeshift bench, and if I could have been physically sick, I would have.

They were locked in a passionate kiss, her hands in his short black hair, and their tongues dancing for dominance. His eyes were locked on mine, and he thought something directly to me, something he knew only I would hear.

_Tonight, she'll be in my bed, bloodsucker. The apple of your eye will be under me, screaming my name as I make her fell the pleasure you never will. And the pain you feel right now, the anguish? THAT is my victory._

I turned and ran.

I ran as if the hounds of hell were after me, exerting every single ounce of my strength and speed, and reaching a velocity that I didn't even know I could. I was the fastest of our little family, not by much, but by enough to leave me standing in my house for sixty-seven full seconds before Melissa came barreling through the door, eyes intent on my face. I spoke without an ounce of emotion in my voice.

"Tell me what emotion she was feeling in his arms. Please, tell me she wasn't happy. Tell me she felt guilt, or sorrow, or horror, or anything. Just please don't tell me she wanted that. Please…"

I searched her face, her eyes, and she finally let out a little puff of air.

"E, for some reason, I can't trace anything in that girl. She was completely closed off to me. What I'm about to say is going to hurt, and I'm sorry for that, but you need to hear it. It doesn't take a mind reader to see what she was feeling. I could feel her happiness. I could see the glow on her skin. She looked to be…truly enjoying herself. I'm sorry, E."

She had edged closer as I broke down in front of her. Agony ripping through my chest as my body tried to find some avenue to release the tears that would no longer fall. I stayed that way, sitting against the wall huddled in Melissa's arms, for almost five hours. We hadn't said a single word. Eventually, I couldn't feel the pain anymore. My body had accepted it, and tuned it out, allowing me to function again. I moved out of Melissa's embrace, standing up and helping to her feet. I hugged her tight, knowing that no one else could have done what she did for me, knowing that she was the best friend I had in this world. And at the same time, knowing that she wouldn't reject me like Bella had.

I looked deep into her amber eyes and did something that I was almost sure would be a mistake; I brought my head down to level with hers, and placed my lips against hers. I marveled at the way she responded to me, kissing me passionately as our arms encircled each other again. I couldn't move, couldn't think, couldn't concentrate on anything but the beautiful creature in front of me.

Vaguely, I heard a voice in the back of my mind screaming at me, telling me that she wasn't the one I was supposed to be doing this with, that the only person whose lips should be crushed to mine had chocolate eyes, not amber. I squashed that voice down into the deepest abyss of my soul and ignored it.

My body was crushed to hers to the point where I couldn't tell where one of our bodies ended and the other began, stone-cold marble on stone-cold marble, the sounds coming from her lips being something between a moan and a growl. I drank those sounds down, straight from her mouth into mine. I could not get enough, and I didn't want to. I didn't want to pull away, to stop, or do any of the other eighteen thousand, six hundred and forty-six things my brain was screaming at me to do. I could only revel in the taste of her lips, the way her body molded against mine, and the way the cloth felt as she ripped it from my chest.

_Whoa. Now that…was fuck-hot._

Her eyes roamed over the expanse of my chest and I could literally feel her gaze land on the ever-so-obvious proof that her hands and mouth were having the exact reaction she wanted. The only thing I could see in her eyes was pure, unadulterated _need_. And I was more than happy to fulfill that need.

The next thirty-two seconds was a literal blur as we flitted up the grand staircase and into my bedroom, and she had thrown me backwards onto my bed before I even had a chance to register what she was doing. In a flash, my pants went the way of my shirt, torn off my body and left in rags on the floor.

Fuck the clothes, that was the single hottest thing I had ever seen a woman do. EVER.

She climbed over me, crawling up the length of my body to have our lips clash again, and it was like I was drinking her in from the lips down. She nipped, bit, sucked, and licked her way down my chest, pulling the skin of my toned stomach into her mouth. I groaned, a guttural sound that escaped my lips without my knowledge or care. Fucking Hell, she was going to kill me. And I'd fucking let her, as long as she kept going.

She stopped her journey south as she came to the waistband of my boxers, and rubbed the side of her face up and down my hard length. I had to grab a fistful of her hair and wrench her head up to meet my gaze. My eyes bore into hers, answering the unspoken question on her lips, and she pulled the boxers off of me slowly, relishing every inch of skin that was exposed.

She gasped when my dick was finally freed of its material prison, and lowered her head so that the wave of her hair covered my view. Which didn't fucking matter, because as soon as she took the tip of me into that hot, slick mouth, I threw my head back and fucking _snarled_.

It felt better than anything I could have imagined. Her lips pursed around my throbbing dick as her hand pumped my shaft. I knew I'd never last if she kept that shit up, so I did the only thing that my lust-ridden brain could think of.

I grabbed hold of her hair in one hand and pulled her up to me, ripping every stitch of clothing off her gorgeous body as I did. She lay naked and panting above me, drowning in the same endless black lake of lust that I had lived with since I had seen Bella. The only difference was; I didn't have to worry about breaking the beautiful woman in front of me, didn't have to worry about hurting her. I could let go, let the monster out, and give Melz what she deserved. A fucking mind-blowing, earth-shattering orgasm for the history books.

I flipped her, growling, and pinned her to the bed. My mouth claimed her ear, her jaw, her lips, her collarbone, and moved down to capture a nipple in my mouth, and her other breast in my hand. Biting hard enough to mark her, I continued my trek south, giving small bites the entire way until I found the source of all of her desire and lust. The heat coming from between her legs was enough to warm my ice-cold skin, and the scent, oh good Lord, the scent. Cane sugar and lilies. I could follow that scent for miles.

"God, I can fucking taste your scent! I could drink you dry."

Her hips bucked against my hands as I gripped her, keeping her still as I dipped my tongue into her wet folds. Fucking Christ. The sounds she was making were driving me wild, growling and moaning as I continued to make slow circles around her clit with my tongue.

This time, it was her turn to grab fistfuls of my hair and pull my lips to hers, and we kissed with the same intensity as before, as if we were going to eat each other from the mouths down.

Her amber eyes, hooded with lust and need, followed me as I positioned myself to drive into her. I rubbed the head of my dick up and down her slit, teasing her until she made small begging noises. I heard the words "Please" and "Oh, God" an incredible amount, and had to torment her once more.

"Tell me what you want, Melz. Tell me what you want or I swear to Christ I will leave you like this!"

She. Fucking_. Snarled_.

My eyes lost all amber in a split second. The black of the monster peeking out.

"Fuck me. Fuck me so hard I forget my own name!"

It was what I was waiting for. I drove myself into her so fast and hard it ripped a scream from her mouth and a growl from mine. There was no time to recover, for either of us. I ripped into her, pushing as hard, fast, and deep as I possibly could, and when it wasn't enough, I pulled her into a sitting position, her straddling my lap, and rocked her into oblivion.

Her breaths were coming in faster pants and were getting shallower by the minute. I knew she was close. Picking her up with my hands on her ass, I threw her into the wall, pounding her the rest of the way into bliss and a screaming climax. My own came seconds later, screaming out her name for all to hear.

"BELLA!"

The world froze, and I said the only two words that I could think of.

"Oh,_ shit_."

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**Yes, Melz is a real person, yes she does rock my world, and yes, Reviews are better than wall-sex with Edward. Yeah fucking right.**


	5. The Professor

**Okay, the last chapter had a lot of people asking questions, and confused. Yes, this is an Edward/Bella story, and yes, eventually, they will end up finding their love for each other. But a story that reads like "So they found each other, fell in love at first sight, and lived happily ever after" just plain blows. This story is filled with angst as well as romance and love, so please don't hate me.**

**Now that that's done…**

**Thank you to everyone that has read and reviewed my little story, my readers are the only thing that keeps me writing. **

**This fic is dedicated to Melissa, my Melz. She is my sun in an endless sea of darkness, my shadow when the world is too bright. She knows my faults, my weaknesses, and she tolerates me through my idiocies and retardation. She helps me to tame the monster, and loves me in spite of it. **

** For Melz.**

***~Disclaimer~***

**Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight, I own a belly full of turkey and a phone that needs to ring soon. **

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I had successfully kept Melissa from tearing my head (and various other appendages I'm slightly fonder of) off of my body, and finally had time to reflect on what had happened. It was the most mind-blowing sexual experience I had ever had in all my years of existence. Now I just had to figure out whether it was because of the actual act, the fact that it was with Melz, or the fact that I had been fantasizing that it was Bella the entire time.

I was leaning towards the latter.

Melissa was great. Absolutely complimented me in every way, shape, and form. But she just wasn't _Bella_. I couldn't put my finger on it, but for some reason, Bella inhabited my every thought. I couldn't feed without thinking what Bella was eating, couldn't shower without thinking that she might be doing the same. The thought of Bella, naked and dripping wet, elicited such a thrill that I thought I might spontaneously combust.

It was the reason that her betrayal hurt so badly.

_Stop thinking like that. She's not yours. She would have run screaming as soon as she found out your... diet, anyways, so man the fuck up. Stop acting like a pining teenager and do something about it._

Sighing, I let my mind wander. The annoying little voice in my head was right. I had no claim on her, had no reason to consider her mine. So she knew my secret. I had spent one night baring my soul to her, and now I thought we were what?

Dating? Obviously not, with her actions with the mongrel.

Involved? Well, we were involved no matter what either of our actions were.

Fated to be together? Well, maybe, but I'd never find out.

Unless I actually took my own advice and did something about it.

I couldn't just sit here and brood for the next century, or until nature took its own course and she died a natural death. The thought of her ceasing to grace this small, insignificant existence had my blood boiling and me sinking into an even bigger well of self-pity and despair. I had to see her. I was out my window and perched on the tree outside hers in less then forty-seven seconds.

I could see her, spread out on her bed, wearing nothing but a chiffon pink bathrobe. She had the phone to her ear, and before I could discern who she could be talking to at this hour, her voice floated to my ears.

"Jake, listen. What happened was a mistake. A _monumental_ mistake. I never should have come down to La Push to begin with, and the night air, mixed with the god damn case of beer did not make for a good decision making mind-set…"

I hissed as I heard her talking to the dog. Jacob. That fucking _mutt_. It completely escaped me for minutes on end what the meaning behind her words were.

A mistake. She called it a mistake. Beer and ambiance? _She regretted it!_ I pumped my fist in triumph, nearly cracking the branch above me with the force of the action.

"And I apologize for the other thing, calling out _his_ name and all, but he's been dominating my thoughts lately. Edward's the only one I want to be with… I think I'm in love with him, Jake. I'm sorry."

Words failed me. Actions failed me. My whole fucking body failed me as her words rang through my mind. She called out my name. I was the only one she wanted, and _she fucking loved me!_ If my heart could have beaten, it would have been clocked at about a hundred miles an hour. Now the question was…what to do about it?

Looking back, it was probably a stupid thing to do, but it was so worth it. At least I waited until she was off the phone…

My nails raked across her window, knowing that the sound was akin to that horrible nails-on-a-chalkboard screech. Although, I do have to say, it was incredibly cute watching her jump almost four feet vertically. Her eyes locked on mine as she all but seethed.

"What are you doing here and how long have you been sitting there?!"

"Bella," I breathed her name in a near whisper. "Can I come in?"

Her eyes narrowed, but she opened the window, motioning me to the chair next to her bed.

_Okay, Cullen. Time to man up. No excuses, no beating around the bush. MAN THE FUCK UP._

I took a deep breath, trained my eyes to hers, and began to rant.

"Bella, you've been in my mind since the day I first scented you. You've been involved in my every thought, action, and idea. Hell, I take a shower and wonder what shampoo to use! I watch the sun set and wonder what you're cooking. I watch it rise and try to predict what outfit you'll wear."

I sighed, knowing that the next sentence I spoke would be the deal breaker. It would either have her running into my arms or running for the hills. I was seriously hoping for the former.

"Bella, I truly believe that I've been in love with you since the second I heard your voice. The second your scent hit my nostrils, and I saw your hair blow around your face. I love the way your eyes light up when you laugh, and the emotion I see when you talk of something you're passionate about. You know my darkest secret, and yet you still care for me.

You can tell me right now that I have this all wrong, that you don't feel for me the same way, and I will disappear. I'll leave you alone, and it will be like I never existed. You can go on with your life. All you have to do is tell me."

By the end of my speech, I was speaking so fast my words had began to blur together, and my eyes had drifted to the floor. It was three minutes and forty-two seconds before she spoke, and I dreaded what I was about to hear.

" Edward, I don't know what to say…"

My hands were on the window sill and I was a half-heartbeat from plunging myself into the darkness and trees of the forest. The only thing stopping me was a small hand on my forearm, stilling all movement and thought.

"You didn't let me finish." She stated, matter-of-factly. "I don't know what to say because everything that you've just said is mirrored in me. I wonder what you're doing when I go to sleep, where you're running off to with that incredible speed.

Your face is the last thing I see when I close my eyes at night, and the first thing I think about in the morning is your voice. I think about what conditioner you use to make your hair so soft, and the way you always seem to smell of sun, sand, and leather.

I've loved you since the second I heard you speak, and your voice felt like velvet across my skin. I love the way your eyes seem like Christmas morning, and how sometimes there are red flecks mixed in with the green of the contacts."

I couldn't move, couldn't speak, couldn't do anything but stare at her. I was drowning in a sea of chocolate, and I couldn't have surfaced for air if I wanted to. But first things first. We needed to find out a little more about each other. There were questions that I needed answered, and there were certain things she needed to know.

"Bella, my love, I have a favor to ask. Would we mind if we did a bit more of the quid pro quo we had started the other night?"

Her eyes surveyed me with intensity as she resumed her sitting position on her bed, and I occupied the recliner again. With her hands, she motioned for me to start. It seemed I would forever be making the first move with Bella, and that didn't bother me in the slightest.

"I'll begin where we left off the other night. We were discussing the accuracies of modern vampire mythology. Do you remember the last question I asked you?"

Her eyes were wary as she nodded her head in affirmation. I knew this was going to be a problem. Before I even said it, I knew.

"We survive by drinking blood, you already know that. My family are 'vegetarians', meaning they only sate their thirst with animal blood."

I couldn't help but grimace as I said this, my family's 'diet' was something of a sore spot.

"I don't…didn't… follow their eating habits. I hunted…ate…humans. I made sure they were unknown, with no familial ties, and were the dregs of society. I fed from the drug dealers, the rapists, the murderers. I was able, in this way, to play judge, jury, and executioner. I kept the scum from causing harm to anyone else, and in this way I was able to justify my sins. I am the worst kind of monster. But I feel you need to know something.

The first time I went to hunt after our meeting that night, I found something odd. I couldn't do it. I had my prey in my hands, their neck bare beneath my teeth, and something stopped me. _You_ stopped me. Your face was in my mind, your voice in my ear, telling me to stop, that I was better than the deed I was about to commit. I have begun to follow my family's diet, and I've found that as long as you are the reason, it can suffice.

Now, I've answered, more in-depth than you probably wanted to hear, the more pressing question. I need to ask one of you. I don't want to know the answer, it'll probably kill me to hear it, but I must know. What happened that night in La Push?"

Throughout my speech, her eyes had remained on the floor, until I had begun talking about the specifics of my diet. She was wide-eyed, repulsed, and shocked, all at the same time. Until I mentioned the events of her time in La Push. The look on her face made my heart drop to the vicinity of my boots.

I knew without her saying a word what had transpired. It killed me. And it hurt even worse knowing that I had done the very same thing.

I truly was the worst kind of monster.

*

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**My readers are the epitome of Epic Win. If you don't get the reference, you're obviously not a gamer =P.**

**If you haven't read Breaking Trinity by VvDeadRosesvV, please check it out, it is a truly awesome piece of writing, and it is written by the real-life Melz, the inspiration for the character in my fic.**

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	6. The Mistress of Bad News

**All righty. I know a lot of you were not quite happy with the length of the last chapter, but I had originally intended chapters 5 and 6 to be one chapter, and had to break it down. That seemed the best place to do so. **

**No, I am most definetely not Team Jacob. Anyone that follows a member of the opposite sex around for years just on the possibility that they may end up being able to love them strikes me as a little sad. Puppy needs to let his balls drop and stop being a neuter.**

**That being said, hopefully I'll be able to get a few more chapters out before I take a break, because at the end of the month I will be packing up my whole life to go and be with the woman of my dreams, my soul mate, VvDeadRosesvV. If you don't know by now, she is the real life Melz, in all her splendor, and I'm the lucky motherfucker that gets to wake up every day next to her. Glorious.**

**SM owns Twilight. I own a million job applications and an aching heart.**

**And on with the show!!**

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_I knew without her saying a word what had transpired. It killed me. And it hurt even worse knowing that I had done the very same thing._

_I truly was the worst kind of monster._

I understood that we weren't together, not anything near exclusive in whatever "relationship" we actually did have. But sill knowing that she had let that dirty, motherfucking mongrel touch her set my blood boiling and my venom flowing.

I knew I had no right to be upset. Hell, I knew that I had done the same exact God damn thing. And it still ate away at me. And what's worse, I'd made her feel like shit because of it. I could only see one way to make it right, and I could only hope to whatever God was listening that she could forgive me.

Placing my finger under her chin, I brought her eyes up to mine. The sadness and guilt swimming in the chocolate depths there was enough to bring a strangled sound from my throat.

"Bella, listen. I hope you can forgive me for what I'm about to say, and I'll understand if you can't. But you need to hear this. I made a mistake, too. There's a vampire that lives with my family and I, and she just looked so much like you. She comforted me after I found you in his arms in La Push, helped me to stop from going back there and breaking that piece of shit treaty. I don't know what the fuck I was thinking, and I don't know how the hell I let it go as far as I did. I've probably fucked this and my friendship up at the same time with my God damn stupidity..."

I was fucking rambling at this point, the words blending together to the point that they were barely comprehensible, and my eyes and resumed their stare at the floor. I stopped speaking when Bella had placed one slender finger on my mouth.

"Shh. Slow down. I don't understand what you're saying. Do you mean that you were watching me in La Push?"

I nodded, trying to explain my stalker-ish actions.

"Yes. I had taken Melissa with me, intent on finding that _fucking_ mongrel," I spat. "But when we came across the two of you, you were in his arms and his lips were on yours... I lost my mind. When we got back to the house, I sat there while Melz held me for hours. We kissed, and then ended up in my bedroom..."

Her eyes lit up as the realization dawned on her, and she wasn't fast enough to hide the anguish and despair in her face.

The next sentence to come out of my mouth was something I hadn't planned on telling her. I don't know how it passed through my lips without my bear trap of a brain catching it first, but it did. And the damage was done.

"I called out your name, too."

I actually lost track of the time it took her to respond, which is a rarity for me. Usually the ticking of seconds as they turned to minutes and minutes becoming years was a comfort. This time, I only wanted to hear her voice. To know how bad the damage was, and if it was beyond repair.

For the first time in one-hundred and nine years of existence, I prayed. I prayed like my life depended on it because, hell, it really fucking did.

_I pray to God, or the Devil will do, if there is any justice in my miserable fucking existence, please, please, please, let this brown-haired angel forgive me of my past._

Yeah, somehow, only I can curse while trying to ask a diety for help in my love life. Fuck, was I screwed.

My mind was literally blown away by the feeling of soft arms around my neck, and Bella's face pressed against the crook of my arm. Her scent burned through my nostrils, leaving liquid fire running through my entire body. I couldn't think, my human brain pushed into the far recessed of my skull, and the beast again reared his ugly head.

A snarl ripped through my lips, and I knew my eyes were jet-fucking-black.

I hadn't fed today.

Son-of-a-motherfucking-bitch-in-heat.

How could I be so stupid? I should have known I'd end up here, with Bella. How could I have forgotten to feed? It was uncharacteristic, unhealthy, and god damn fucking dangerous, and yet I had done it anyway.

I threw her off of me, at least retaining enough of my humanity to make sure she landed on the bed and away from harm, as I shot out of her window and into the forest. I needed blood. Vast fucking amounts of blood. Every step I took in the opposite direction of the sweetest nector in heaven or earth was a fucking miracle, and I thanked anyone I fucking could for giving me the strength to walk out of there.

It took me the better part of ten minutes to find a decent meal.

A female wolf, silently stalking a deer as I stalked her.

I couldn't help but laugh inwardly as the irony struck me. How fitting that I had stopped a wolf from hurting Bella, only to find her in his arms, and then back in mine. And now, here I was, able to take my revenge on another of a like kind.

Her blood slid down my throat, soothing the constant burn and allowing my humanity to surface and take control once more. But it wasn't enough. I caught the deer that the wolf had been stalking and drained it as well, and then four more along the way. My body was so full of copious liquid that I couldn't have drank Bella dry if I wanted to.

And, God help me, I wanted to.

***

It was near dawn when I returned to the mansion, and Alice was waiting for me on the back porch. I didn't even have time to properly clear the treeline before the fey jumped me and brought my ass to the ground, squeeling for all the world like a little sister who had just gotten the present she wanted from her brother.

"Jesus Alice, what the fuck?"

Her hand stinging the back of my head fucking hurt, let me tell you.

"Watch your fucking mouth, Edward. And I'm happy because you told Bella everything! And she still wants and loves you back!! When can I meet her? I know she doesn't like shopping, but we'll have so much fun!"

She was bouncing up and down by this point, clapping her hands together like the teenage girl she pretended to be.

Alice was...odd.

"Alice, I don't even know when I'll see her next. I almost fucking ripped her throat out last night, and completely ran out on her after I stopped myself. If she's not pissed at me right now, it'll be a fucking miracle."

"Oh Edward, she's not pissed at you...about that. But she is a little ticked that you didn't call or text her so she knew that everything is okay. So, when are you telling her you're bringing her over this weekend to meet the family?"

"WHAT?! Since when the fuck am I bringing a human girl, specifically the human girl that I love and can't live without, into a house full of vampires? That's pretty much assisted suicide, Hobbit..."

And I stress again, that girl had a vicious back-of-the-head-you're-a-dick smack.

Alice continued on to inform me that I had already made the decision, and that she'd foreseen the family's instant acceptance and growing love for her. Well, fuck it. If the fey wanted to meet Bella, then Bella would meet the fucking Hobbit. Too fucking short and spry for her own good, Alice most certainly was.

Yeah, I couldn't pull off Yoda even when I tried.

Grabbing her by the hand, I sped off towards Bella's house, damn near dragging Alice behind me like a rag doll. It took a little longer then usual to get there, but we still made it in under three minutes. Thankfully the cruiser wasn't in its normal spot in the driveway, and the death-trap of a Chevy was. So the Chief was gone for the day and my Bella was all alone in that house. Perfect.

Even though I had never been in trouble with the law, and therefore never given the chance to get on the Chief's bad side, he was still leery of us. Most humans were, given the oddly discolored eyes and the chalk-white skin. I wanted to give him no reason to change his habits now.

Pressing my ear to the door, I tracked the sounds emanating from inside the house. I heard running water, footsteps, and...Claire de Lune? Who would have thought that both Bella and I would both be into the Classical shit? Just another similarity in the ever-growing list.

"Oh my god, Edward. Man up. She already knows you're here and she'll be opening the door in...now."

Alice was literally in the process of saying the word 'now' as the door creaked open, and Bella stood in the door looking entirely too edible. In _every_ sense of the word. I fucking hated the Hobbit sometimes. She took all the suspense out of shit.

"Hi, Edward. Who's your friend? This isn't...?"

It took me a second before I realized what she was talking about, and I barked a short laugh at the incredibility of what she was suggesting.

"Bella, this is Alice. She's Jasper's mate, and my 'sister'. She's the one that has the visions I was telling you about that night."

Before I had even had the chance to finish my sentence Alice was bounding forward and throwing her arms around Bella's neck in a tight hug. I already knew the rant that was coming, so I silently apologized to Bella with my eyes.

"Bella, it's so good to finally meet you! As you know, I'm Alice, and I know we're going to be best friends! We can go shopping, play dress-up, and all sorts of other girly things! And talk about boys. We definetely have to talk about boys!"

I was literally doubled over with laughter by the end of Alice's tirade, and I watched as Bella's eyes went wide at the prospect of shopping and dress-up, and my favorite shade of red graced her face as Alice spoke of talking about boys. She smelled fucking _good._

They had spent the better part of an hour talking, introducing themselves, and just getting to know one another in general, when that ugly word reared it's head again.

School.

The clock was quickely coming up on the time we all needed to leave, to maintain the pretense of a normal life. Leaving Alice with Bella, I sprinted home and grabbed the Volvo, figuring if we were all in one place already, it would just be easier to take one car to school. Think green and all that shit.

Who was I kidding? I just wanted to be in a car with Bella. Her scent would drive me fucking crazy, and being in that closed off of an area with her was likey to make her scent even stronger.

Was I a masochist? Constantly causing myself more pain and suffering at the hands of this delicate little girl? Surely not...

Yeah, I was. So fucked.

We'd made it to the school in record time, laughing the whole way at how Bella gripped her seat belt as we sped along at ridiculous speeds. I wasn't sure if it was the speed, or the way I took turns at about three times the recommended pace, but she damn near kissed the ground when we pulled up. And again, the consequences of my actions crept up on me.

By arriving with Bella in my car I had started a chain reaction of events.

First, her small group of friends looked over at us with astonishment, their eyes almost bugging out of their head when I reached my arm around her shoulder.

Second, I had now just told the student body, in not as many words, that Bella and I were an item, and were both now off limits to anyone else. Strangely, I couldn't feel bad about that one.

And third, this being as small a town as it is, somehow Chief Swan was going to find out about us. The very thing I had wanted to avoid, I would have to face head on.

Fucking yipee.

Unfortunately, today I didn't have biology with Bella, so I had to wait until lunch to even see her again. But I could wait. If I had nothing else in this world, I had time.

Telling Bella that I'd see her at lunch, Alice and I migrated across the parking lot to join Emmet, leaning against his Jeep. Em was one of those people that looked scary as shit, until you got to know him. Then he turned from the grizzly he looked like, into a freaking teddy bear. I swear, he was the only guy that could be that big, and still as soft as a pillow. If anyone ever said that to him, though, he'd rip their throat out with his bare hands.

"Hey Em, heard you talked to Rose last night. How's she doing?"

Rosalie was my other "sister". Gorgeous as all hell, a literal drop-dead beauty and Emmet's soul mate. I have no idea how the two of them, completely on opposite ends of the spectrum, could love each other, but then again, who was I to talk? I fell in love with a human.

Rose was in Italy checking out some designs for Porche's new engine mods, and we hadn't seen her in over a week. It was weird when any of us were away for long periods of time, because we'd spent so much time together as a unit. When you spend the better part of a century with a particular group of people, you tend to miss them when you don't see them for a few days. Even though I fucking hated Rose with a passion sometimes, I could at least admit to myself that I missed her.

"She's good, bro. Says she'll be home on Friday or so, so we have at least the night to ourselves to...catch up. I figure we'll need a bit of alone time before we have to pretend to be humans again. So what's with you and your human?"

Fuck, sometimes the lug was more perceptive then I gave him credit for.

"Well, to put it bluntly, Em, she's my Rosalie. I've known her for less than a week, and I can honestly say I'm head over heels for her. Everything she does, everything she says, makes me want her even more. Add that with the fact that she has the sweetest blood I've ever scented before..."

Emmet's expression went from shock, to understanding, to want in less than twenty seconds flat.

"Oh shit. Brother, you are fucked. I thought she smelled good from here, but...damn."

"Yeah man, I know. Trust me, I know. I'm bringing her over to the house on Saturday to meet the fam, think you could warn everyone for me? Alice says that Rose won't like her, but everyone else will. No foreseen problems at least."

Em looked pensive for a few seconds, before clapping me on the back. We did the whole manly half-hug-half-back slap thing, and we both smiled.

"Sure bro, I'll make sure to keep Rose in line, and you just make sure that girl is the right one for you. We don't need another Tanya episode to fuck us all up."

I cringed at the sound of Tanya's name. She was still a sore spot for all of us.

Once upon a time, Tanya was my fiance. Beautiful as hell on the outside, and a fiery pit of bitch on the inside. My family hated her, her family loved me, and I was all set to defy my family's wishes and make her a Cullen.

Until I caught her involved in a foursome with three men.

That was the end of Tanya, and I hadn't seen her since, thank God.

Bella was another story. If I hadn't thought she'd run off screaming, I would have dropped to one knee and proposed to her last night, but I wanted to do this right. I had all the time in the world to wait. I'd already given up human blood for her, it wasn't like I couldn't wait for something that neither of us was really ready for. But still. The way she walked, the musical quality of her voice, that blush. Everything about her screamed innocent and fragile. I knew if I said that to her she'd probably beat my ass. She may have the whole doe-eyed girl-next-door look, but that girl was a fighter, and I knew it.

Now I just had to get her to come to a house full of vampires that hadn't tasted human blood in years, and then to accept my offer. I wanted no mistakes between us, no questions. I needed to claim her, in every way possible. And the only way for me to do that was to ask for exclusivity. Sure, the terms boyfriend and girlfriend sounded all sorts of childish and unworthy of what Bella and I had, but if the term was the right one, I'd ask Bella to be mine.

I just hoped to God she'd say yes.

As I walked into the school building Alice brought up the one thing I hadn't thought about in my love-filled haze.

"Um, Edward? How do you think Melissa and Bella are going to respond to each other? I can't see what happens between the two of them..."

Melissa.

And Bella.

In the same room.

Fuck. Me.

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**And there you have chapter 6! It was a little longer than normal, but I'll try to keep this the normal length from here on out. The next chapter will be the Cullens meeting Bella, and the altercation between Melz and Bella. **

**Have something you'd like to see? Thoughts and criticisms of characters or the story? I'd love to hear what ya'll think, so please click the green button below and leave me some love. Anyone who reviews gets snarls from Edward. =)**

**Author rec's:**

**Breaking Trinity by VvDeadRosesvV**

_**Mid-Semester, Senior Year. Bella is escaping Arizona and starting over in Washington. An unexpected hook-up at a party in Port Angeles turns into obsession. What happens when desire becomes too much to control?**_

**Of course, the love of my life, my soul mate, and the most intense writer of Snarlward you'll ever meet! Make sure you check out Breaking Trinity at **

**www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5379823/1/**

**Clipped Wings and Inked Armor by HunterHunting**

_**Haunted by her past Bella is broken and alone. Starting over, can she let go of the guilt that consumes her when she meets a beautiful tattoo artist or will his own personal demons destroy them first? **_

**www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5379823/1/**

**The Runaways by SimplyDazzling**

_**Events in the past have caused Edward to be broken. Both him and his makeshift family have enough pain to fill an entire lifetime. The call themselves "The Runaways." Whether it's a dark past, family issue, or simply the feeling of loneliness, they are all bonded in unexplainable ways. The only thing no one ever knew was how deep Edward Cullen really was. With secrets so forbidden, so deadly, he had locked himself up and distanced himself from the actual world. Bella's the "it" girl with everything she could ever want and more. She's got a future full of options, and many people that adore and love her. Getting mixed in with the Runaways was something she chose to do, but something she had been warned over and over not to. Brining Bella into his dark life wasn't something he wanted to do, and yet, somehow was unavoidable. As secrets of the past unravel, the killing games began to become more intense – threatening to tear the six of them apart forever.**_

**www(dotfanfiction(dot)net/s/5476271/1/**

**Reviews are better than Alice talking about boys!!**


	7. Meet The Robinsons

**Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed my little story here, and I apologize for not being able to respond to every review the way they should be. I promise that anyone who reviews this chapter will get a PM from me, where I will promptly profess my love for each and every one of you!**

**This is the long awaited showdown between Melissa and Bella, so strap in folks, it's going to get bumpy. **

**SM owns Twilight. **

**I own an atomic clock/calender that is counting days way too slowly.**

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The Cullen mansion is fucking ridiculous.

Even I, with my penchant for overdoing things, believed that the house was insane. Made up completely of glass windows and bright colors, it truly was the one place we didn't have to hide our true nature.

I knew Bella had never been to our particular haven, so I figured courtesy was the better part of valour.

She sat in the passenger seat of my little Volvo, wringing her hands and grinding her teeth. You'd think she was going to be walking into a house of murderers, the way she acted...

Oh, wait...

Yeah.

At least she had calmed slightly by the time we actually pulled up the long drive to the house proper. Her hands were dormant and she was humming along with the music. Tchaichovsky's Twelth Sonata in B Minor. Who knew we'd even be able to enjoy classical music together?

It was insane, the ridiculous amount of general bullshit we had in common. From our taste in cars, to music, to sexual positions. It seemed like she really was the female version of the human me.

That, and the cutest blush raged across her features when I brought up the subject of sexual positions.

It had taken us less time then it should have to reach the mansion, due to my characteristic lack of concern for speed limits and road rules, and soon enough I was opening the passenger side door to the car. I watched Bella's eyes bug out of her head as she took in the endless expanse of the house, and tried to explain as simply as I could.

"The Cullens have always been wealthy. When Alice joined our 'family', she was able to predict certain trends in the stock market, so we were able to increase our wealth exponentially, and quickly. Carlisle himself has an estimated net worth of over six-hundred fifty million dollars, not including assets. We have enough money to live a luxurious lifestyle, and we enjoy doing so. This is the one place where we don't have to hide what we are. We can truly be ourselves here."

She simply nodded, worrying her bottom lip with her teeth. She was nervous.

And she had every right to be.

Thankfully, the front door opening broke me out of my self-induced semi-brooding, and Alice bounded out and crushed Bella into a hug. She certainly took it like a champ, though, leaning into the hug and responding to Alice as though she were a long lost friend.

"Oh Bella, it so great to see you again! Come on, you have to meet the rest of the family!"

Alice took her by the hand and led her through the portal, as I followed closely behind. Alice's thoughts made their way to me in the meantime, and I couldnt help but chuckle dryly.

_Don't worry Edward. I don't foresee any violence from Jasper, Emmet, Rose, Carlisle, or Esme. Melissa's intentions are...clouded._

Like I was worried about Em, Jazz, Carlisle, or Esme. Rose was...Rose. I had an inkling that they wouldn't get along, but I highly doubted Rose would do anything to harm Bella. I just didn't see that type of animosity coming from her.

Melz was another story.

I had avoided Melissa since the incident, and had been mostly successful. We had one run-in a few days ago were she called me an overbearing, self-righteous prick, but other than that, it had been relatively quiet between us. Now that i was about to literally flaunt the human that I had chosen over her in her face, I somehow doubted that this situation could turn out pretty.

Luckily, Melz was out hunting, and I wouldn't have to worry about that particular confrontation until a little later in the day.

Alice led Bella into our sitting room, a large, open area filled with priceless Van Gogh's and Picasso's, and sat with her on one of our overly large couches. My family filed in slowly after.

I could hear Emmet's thoughts from two rooms away, they were so loud. I couldn't help but smile as I heard just what he thought about the human sitting nervously on our couch.

_Hell yes! Finally got someone that can take Ed out of his self-induced moping! She's gotta be hot... he's never had a thing for plain Janes..._

Esme and Alice both had that holy-hell-it's-about-time thought process going, so I didn't have to actually hear the words in their heads. Rose was studiosly transliterating the owner's manual of a 1969 Camaro Z28 T-Top into French, so I really had no idea what she was thinking, though she couldn't hide the scowl on her face as she took in Bella's appearance.

Jasper's thoughts were...unnerving.

_Edward, do you know what you're doing? We've never had someone who felt...hopeful...around us before, and that's the only emotion I'm getting from her. She seems nervous about meeting us, but it's like she's hoping for something to happen._

That was something I hadn't expected. What could Bella possibly be hoping for in a situation like this? Other than the obvious I-hope-they-don't-kill-me thing.

I didn't want to think what Bella might be hopeful for. Certain things I would not allow myself to think.

But then again, a month ago I wouldn't have allowed myself to feel anything for Bella.

Carlisle came in last, and it was his acceptance, his blessing I wanted more than anything else. His thoughts left me dazed.

_Edward, you know I love you as my son. This Bella, she's good for you. You're happier than I've seen you in decades, and you actually look forward to daylight now. Even if it is just to see her again. She brings light to your world of darkness, son, and I love her already, if for that and nothing else. She is your soul mate, your other half, the one who makes your existence worthwhile. She is the reason you've waited a hundred years to fall in love. I can feel nothing but pride for you, Edward. Don't fuck this up._

I was glowing. There was no other way to describe the feeling of elation at his thoughts. He was proud of me! Fat, cherub-faced angels could have been playing a chorus of Hallelujah for how truly happy I was in that moment.

I should have known it wouldn't last.

I should have heard her coming, should have been listening for her thoughts. A hundred million "should-have's" ran through my mind the second I heard the words come from the doorway.

"So, this is the Bella that has our Edward all a-twitter."

My unbeating heart was in my throat as I watched Melissa stalk across the room to stand directly in front of my Bella. If looks could kill, Bella would be pushing up daisies right about now.

Melz spoke directly to Bella, as if no one was in the room but the two of them.

"Listen to me. I understand how much you mean to him, and I understand that you love him. If you _ever_ give me a reason, or if you ever cause him to hurt in any way, I swear to God I will rip the bones from your joints one by one until you are nothing more then a pile of pieces on the ground. Are we clear?"

Bella's slap resounded across the room with a deafening roar.

"Now you listen here. Edward and I will have our problems, just as any in-love couple will. The point is that _we_ will work through it. I'm not perfect, and I don't pretend to be, but I know that _this_, us, is real. I will do whatever I can to make sure that he's happy, and whatever tough times we come across, we'll deal with. As long as we love each other, everything else will eventually fall into place. And we have the rest of our lives to make it work."

Melz had inched slightly closer, with Hellfire in her eyes from the slap, and I felt myself flying.

My body moved of its own accord, landing me directly between Bella and Melissa. My arm shot out, landing on Melissa's shoulder, and I spoke softly, knowing only the undead in this room would hear. My voice was near a growl, and my lips pulled back into a snarl.

"Listen up, because I'll only say this once. I'll not apologize for what happened between us, nor will I claim that it was right of me to do it. But you need to understand, I _love_ this human, with every fiber of my being. If you so much as harm a single chestnut strand of her hair, I swear to God that I will tear you limb from limb and burn the pieces. Are we clear?"

I watched as her whoe body tensed, and I was worried that I might actually have to come through on my threat. I knew I could, even would, if it meant Bella would be safe.

But I didn't want to.

Melissa was still my best friend. She was still someone that I had spent countless hours with doing nothing, and everything. I just wanted her to see that I was happy, and for her to be happy for me. Was that too much to ask?

Really, don't answer that.

Her tense, coiled stance visibly relaxed, and she slumped her shoulders, as if in defeat. My eyes followed her as she walked slowly from the room, and I could hear the back door open, and close behind her. I knew I had to make this right.

"Carlisle, Em, Jazz, could you entertain Bella for a bit? Get to know her? I need to take care of something, and I'll be back in just a few moments."

It took me less than six seconds to be out the back door and heading for the forest before I heard it, coming from the left of me, on the back porch.

Melz was crying.

Or at least, the vampire version of crying. She was sitting with her arms wrapped around her legs, which were pulled up to her chest, and she was rocking back and forth. This was one thing that I was absolutely no good at. Consoling a hurt woman was not a 'pro' on my resume.

But I had to try.

Inching forward, almost painfully slow, I sat next to her. Unsure of myself, I did the only thing I knew to do. I did that same thing for her that she did for me; I wrapped my arms around her and held her, whispering soothing words to her and I let her continue to rock.

We might have sat there for minutes, or hours. My internal clock had stopped, and I was only concentrating on the woman in my arms, and the carefully recontructed walls I had placed between us. After the longest time, she spoke.

"You don't understand what you mean to me, Edward. You're the goodness that I still see in myself. The light that I had buried so many years ago. You were all of the self-sacrificing, protecting, decent things I never thought I'd have again. And you don't want me."

That hurt. More than I'd care to admit.

"Melz, listen. Nothing has changed between us. I'll still be your knight in shining armor, I'll still be protective over you. But you need to realize that all those things you saw in me, _you_ projected there. I am not self-sacrificing, and I am not good. The light you see, that's you. That'll always be you. You have that purity of soul that I have longed for for a century. I finally found my soul, and it lies with the human girl sitting inside right now. I'm sorry I can't be what you want me to be. I love Bella. I've loved Bella since before she was born. I've been waiting my whole life for her, and now that I've found her, I can't... I _won't_ let her go."

God, I didn't even want to know how much that hurt her, because it hurt me to say it. I could only imagine what that felt like from the other side.

She took off running into the woods, and I knew I needed to give her time. If I chased after her now, I was likely to lose them both. I needed to focus on the beautiful woman I had sitting inside waiting for me. I'd kept her waiting long enough.

The sigh of relief that left my body as I heard Bella's laughter from the living room was extraordinary. Apparently Em was regaling her of one of his bear hunting stories, and I could only chuckle as I remembered the incident.

Sitting myself close to Bella, I swept her hand in mine and brought it to my lips, eliciting a delicious blush and shudder from her.

"Have my family been keeping you company. my love?"

I spoke in that liquid sex tone, all velvet and promises, and watched as her eyes glossed over.

"Ye...yes. Your family is great! I can't believe Em wrestles bears!"

She laughed, that adorable giggle, and I couldn't help but beam at my family. They had really taken to her. They knew that I had fallen in love with a human, and not only had they accepted it, they embraced it!

I was the luckiest son of a bitch in the history of lucky sons of bitches.

Until Bella said something that threw me for a loop.

"I still think that I could take him in arm wrestling if I were one of you!"

I think she said it jokingly. I hoped she was joking.

Then it clicked.

_Hopeful_.

I knew now, beyond a shadow of a doubt, just what she was hopeful for. She wanted to become a Vampire. The monster in me reared his head for the first time tonight, and for once, the rational side of my brain aggreed with him.

_If she were on of us, you wouldn't have to worry about killing her, or drinking her dry, or the Volturi..._

Oh fan-fucking-tastic.

I had forgotten about the Volturi. And Bella had no idea about them. She needed to know.

"Bella, I need to warn you about something, and it's something I know a few of my family members have already thought of. I need to tell you about the Volturi."

We spent the next two hours, my family and Bella, discussing what we knew of the Volturi. We talked about their ranks, what abilities they employed, and the actions they were to take if they were to find out about a human knowing our secret.

"One thing the Volturi punish above all else, is exposure. We can't let them find out. It will mean the end of us all."

_Or...you could grant her wish, and then we wouldn't have to worry about it..._

"No, Alice."

_But..._

"Alice, no. We can talk about this later, but for right now my answer is a resounding, no."

Bella looked at me quizzically, no doubt wondering about the silent conversation Alice and I were having. It wouldn't do to turn her. I couldn't do it. She was too precious, to innocent, and I knew that it would kill a small part of me to commit such a heinous act.

Yet there was another part of me, the part I kept locked away; the monster in me, that was up in arms.

_Why not? She would stop being so fragile, you wouldn't have to worry about hurting her, or killing her...there's no reason you have NOT to do it!_

_No._

_Give me one good reason why not._

I honestly couldn't come up with an answer that sounded legitimate enough.

I could argue that it would be stealing her soul, but that would imply that neither myself nor anyone in my family had one, and I knew that couldn't be true. I could argue that I would be stealing her innocence, and depriving her the wonders of a natural life, but she would be gaining immortality in the process. Thinking about it logically, and in an emotionally detached sort of way, I could see myself doing it.

I figured, fuck it. I needed to know whether or not it was even a thought in Bella's mind. And if it was something she wanted...

"Bella, I need to ask you a serious question. Please think long and hard before you answer this, because this is something that would not only have an impact on you, but my entire family as well. I'm not going to ask for a decision today, but I need to know how you feel about this.

How would you feel about becoming one of us?"

Bella sputtered a bit, and blushed that beautiful blush, and spoke very quietely.

"Well, I actually had that idea when I saw how loving your family was. You all seem so...close, and I'll never be able to have that, simply because I won't have the physical time to spend with anyone to develop that type of relationship. I'd be lying if I didn't say I was scared of it, but at the same time, I'd really have to think about it. I'd be leaving Charlie, Renee, and the wolves...but I stand to gain so much more."

Her voice had dropped to almost a whisper as she spoke the next sentence.

"I'd be able to spend the rest of eternity with you."

I couldn't help the smile that broke across my face. I fucking beamed at her. She wanted to spend the rest of time with me. She wanted _me_.

Visions of laying in her arms, kissing those beautiful lips, and laying in the sun while our skin sparkeled like diamonds flooded my mind's eye. I was happier than I had been in ages, and it took me a full minute to realize I wasn't just daydreaming.

"Alice?"

"You know I can't help it Edward, it's not a switch I can turn on and off. Some is still cloudy, but you saw what I saw."

Looking pointedly at Bella, Alice giggled.

"You two will be very happy together, Bella."

The utter amazement I felt at Alice's visions was suddenly clouded with more. I could see us alone in my bedroom, the unmistakable sounds of passion drifting through the hazy scene, and my eyes literally darkened. To hell with waiting. I knew I could control myself, I knew I wouldn't hurt her. I had kept us both waiting long enough. The feral desire made four words stand out in my head above all else.

_Tonight, Bella was MINE._

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**I had originally intended the big ExB lemon to go in this chapter, but I felt like making you ladies wait with soaking panties for chapter 8. =)**

**I know, I'm a dick, I'm a bastard, but you love me anyways. **

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